i’m having a bit of writer’s block these days. but i really want to write so here goes y haber q’ pasa.
i will start with the easy stuff first…
estoy extranando los angeles. the familiar.
it’s interesting because i used to LOVE to leave l.a. and i loved the feeling of return to home.
it seems that now (maybe its age??) i will appreciate my arrival home even more.
let me explain…
i love being around my sister. that is the best part about oaxaca right now. i love her crazy ways and her mexican “martha stewartness”and her constant, “KALIMAN!” as she chases her cat away from the lizards. i appreciate watching her and m enjoy their relationship by holding hands and exchanging carinos as they sit and drink their espresso cortado (double shot of espresso!) as they get themselves “organized” for the soon here wedding this saturday.i especially appreciate that they can see beyond traditional “weddings” and “marriage” definitions imposed by society. their wedding will be as unique as their pets! lol 😉 the cat who wants to be a dog and the dog that wants to be a cat, ha ja ha.
i guess if i write with extreme honesty i would say that what i miss most when i am in los angeles is my sister and my brother moises. it has been a long process to re-create the feeling of family in los angeles. when i moved back to los angeles in 2005, extremely hopeful and excited about sunday breakfast’s with my family and at the time partner, excited to be in my nephew’s life as he grew older and struggled to navigate this sometimes cruel world, etc, etc. needless to give the long story, things didn’t turn out the way i envisioned them, instead it has been a journey to explore what family, friendship, and community can mean in a city like l.a. slowly finding my way back to what is important to me and in that process welcoming in new relationships and a more “true to me” lifestyle.
so i think that as i enjoy the oaxaca sun and dusty streets i am also reflecting on the special community being created in los angeles. secretly i want my sister to be back in los angeles but i also secrectly want her to be here in oaxaca so that i can come visit her 🙂 i used to really want her to come live in l.a. and finally (i am sure she is happy about this) i am able to appreciate her life in oaxaca. she has here what i have there. and i couldn’t wish more for her than that. as her wedding approaches her friends here have been amazingly supportive and loving throughout the process. yay! yupi! life is so much sunnier when we have loved ones watching out for us!
while i am here there is a week long film festival and a week long seminario on autonomous communities. things are happening here in oaxaca, lots of learning and lessons to take back to the states. political and movement making lessons just as well as “enjoy life more” lessons. for example, last night i laughed so hard at the danger of catching on fire! i can’t remember when i had experienced a firework “castillo” but i had seen them on tele-novelas/soap operas and in my imagination as others including d would share their experience of them at festivals and holidays. a “castillo” is a HUGE firework shaped as a castle. but not a princess castle its more like lots of fire works that shape different things like flowers, helicopters, or words carrying a message. the fireworks are carefully built to create a “castillo” with several layers that build up. last night’s castillo was in honor of pasqua/easter. i will try and post a picture too. one of my favorite moments was before they lit the “castillo” firework. young men carried bulls and people shaped puppets with exploding fireworks. the men carried them and skipped up and down the block, dancing to live music. it was so dangerously funny that, s, m’s friend j, and i burst into loud laughter!
so yes, i think that in the states and particularly in los angeles, we must learn to laugh much, much more. we work so much and really at the end of the day i am not sure if all the working we do will pay off if we don’t also include in our daily routine some good eating, walking, and laughing, lots of it.
here’s to the crazy bull fireworks being pointed at the audience 🙂
alright, more soon i hope.